I went on the Norwegian Gem cruise to the Bahamas with my family. It was glorious fun for us all, with lots of activities, along with the promised sun, sand and surf. However, the Cynic’s Eye couldn’t help spotting some interesting things:
Twisting by the pool
Everyone just gobbled down lots of food and then lay out in the sun – probably to help digest it all. We saw something similar in the crocodiles in the Florida Everglades – where the crocodiles just gulped down their prey without chewing and bask in the sun letting the sun’s heat cook the food inside their hard shells. The locals call it “the Croc-Pot”.
On the beach or by the pool, before you could say “Here comes the Sun…”, I say, everyone had turned red. Not so many people have turned red since the Russians swept across Eastern Europe.
Due to the fear of communicable diseases, the cruise staff went ballistic in dispensing hand sanitizer lotion. Everyone was just walking around wringing their hands. Imagine what they could be thinking: “Darn it, I should have pushed my wife overboard last night!” “I should have eaten that second burger… Urgh, I wouldn’t get a chance to have another meal for 30 minutes”
It boggles the mind to imagine a convention of OCD patients on such a cruise.
Sign me on
The cruise liner had even arranged for two sign language experts for the hearing-impaired passengers to help understand and enjoy all the entertainment shows (magic shows, Broadway-style, stand-up comedy) onboard. Those passengers came out on top, as they always got the signal from the mimes when to laugh and when to clap.
State of the Room
Boy, were the rooms small? You can’t even fit in the word “room” in the room. Probably squeeze in Rm.
Do they attempt to give the illusion of space by calling them “staterooms”! The only state this size is the Rhode Island and Providence Plantations (did you notice the smallest the state, largest the name)
That sinking feeling
What’s with all the Titanic jokes? Ribbing at it at every occasion – well, except during the safety demonstration. Some of them sank!
When I fly commercial, I don’t get the pilot cracking jokes about “The Hindenburg”…