News reports are coming out of Pyongyang that senior officials are trying to pad up the bio-data of the Great Successor Kim Jung-Un. I thought of giving them a hand:
- On his first round of golf, Kim Jung-Un had a hole-in-one (henceforth called a hole-in-Un in North Korea) on all 18 holes. Then he ran his SUV into 5 fire hydrants on his way back home.
- During his Switzerland school days, Un worked at the CERN during the summers. He discovered a new atomic particle. To honour him, his fellow scientists named the discovery after him – modestly calling it “the god particle”.
- Kim Jung-Un was briefly married to Kim Kardashian, who took on the family name: Kim Kar – (Dash) Un. The marriage was a victim of bloated ego, 24X7 media coverage and self-absorbed obsessiveness. Mrs. Kim just couldn’t handle it and quit within 72 hours.
- Kim Jung-Un was born during confluence of Moon and Sun falling in the house of Leo and the “Lucky” Star. All the North Korean astrologers have since been starry-eyed (as well as bit cross-eyed).
- Kim Jung-Un learned all his military strategy while playing with toy soldiers in his childhood. To repay his gratitude, Ken (of Barbie fame) will be designated as the Grand General of the Army and Mr. Potato Head will be the Quartermaster.
If not the Great Successor to Kim Jung-Il, Kim Jung-Un could stake his claim as the Great Successor to P T Barnum.